One's personality is both a composition and reflection, but if I have to choose one of them, I will choose reflection as the "self" is more important to me than "me". One's composition may change, walking across the cultural landscapes and climbing the social ladder but one's self is tied to one's reflections. The fun part is that reflections are not bound to "Time-Space" barriers ( it is not time-space) and respective mental constructs, which have grown so thick over ages, that they had reduced the image of humans to Sisyphus, rolling different sizes of boulders on hills of different heights.… As the name of this Blog indicates, knols are my perspectives on topics of interests, sweet/bitter experiences or just doodling :)

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Emotional intelligence or emotional wisdom?

There are several points that ask our attentions to redefine and rethink the issues related to emotions:

1- The prefix phobia is a reality that can be attached to any noun to describe a person’s fear. One may amazed when see that almost all individuals have some kind of phobia. But this is also a fact that these phobias could be overcome by the exposure to the source of fear. Some people are feared from some other people, areas or some objects but working with those sources of fears make brave enough to champion them.

2- Every work looks hard and even impossible and unbearable at start but as one stand on it, the work start easing and the standing individual proud to have overcome the hardships and have mastered it. It is very famous the distance looks long but by traveling it shortens or the hands is brave and eyes are coward. It means eyes message to brain that the work is hard but as hands is

3- Teenagers are violent and adults have mature emotions that are developed to suite their work and social requirements. There are vast contrast between emotional reactions of teenagers and adults. Individuals who were violent in their teen ages become emotionally matured and responsible members of their society. This development indicates that these individuals have learned to become wiser through their experience.

4- The nomads are more conservative and violent than villagers and villagers are more conservative and violent than city dwellers. Dwellers of suburban areas of more violent than city centers. Dwellers of small cities are more violent than large cosmopolitan cities. These developing facts indicate that emotional maturity requires learning.

5- The illiterate is more violent than learned individuals. As one the level of learning grows one become emotionally more mature.

6- Unskilled people are more violent than skilled individuals. The same is true for level of experience. The more experienced is one the emotionally mature one becomes.

7- The poor is more violent than rich. The poor has less opportunity to participate in social events and use the new technologies or attend learning programs. Their lives surround around their survival and existence.

8- The underdeveloped nations are more violent than developing and developing nations are more violent than developed nations.

9- The areas ruled by tribal laws are more violent than areas ruled by states. The people of weak estates are more violent than estate with established laws. The estate with poor laws and poor governance the tribal laws replace estate laws and people become more violent for their identities and getting larger shares.

We can add to this list but the above facts indicate to one very important point and that is emotional maturity comes from learning and experience. This was expressed by Bernard Shaw as, “One who is not leftist in his youth has some problems with his heart and one who is not rightist in his matured age has problems with his mind”. Now a day, there is a term used like emotional intelligence. Is really emotions are the product of intelligence? Let’s look for some more examples:

1- The learned people weren’t always bright students. They had one common thing and that was the passion for learning. The students who have passion for learning grow to learned individuals irrespective of their educational records. The dull and medium students have crossed intelligent and bright students.

2- Silent and less social students who were more comfortable in their solitude than in crowds and among people are growing to show good judgments and expressional skills in very creative manners in arts and literature. It was all their sensitivity that was keeping them out of crowd and in their own inner selves. It was their sensitivities that made them able to be different from others.

3- Some individuals get popularity due their easiness in communicating the people. It is not their intelligence but it is their emotional maturity in accepting the people and the differences that exist.

4- There are many successful people with most basic writing and reading skills who manage and lead very bright minds, professional people and highly literate and skilled people. The success of these individuals is mostly due their passions, consistency and hard works rather their intelligence.

5- The people are more creative, productive and active where people feel no hesitation in appreciating good ideas, works and efforts. Similarly people don’t hesitate in accepting their mistakes and failures. Simply in areas where people frequently use the two words of thank you and sorry people are more productive and peaceful than in areas where people feel it ashamed to accept their mistakes and ask apologies for them and similarly feel disgraced by recognizing others and thanks for their good works.

Again we make add to this list but my main aim is neither listing the characteristics of the emotional intelligence nor do I aim to emphasize on the role of the emotional maturity in the progress of an individual and a group of a people. The most important point to note is that, “Emotional maturity is not a function of intelligence but it is learned irrespective of intelligence levels”.

This is a very crucial definition of emotional maturity which make to erase confusion that whether there is existence of emotional intelligence or not? Surely! Intelligence is a composite ability of brain to adapt and survive in a composite environment. Everyone’s success is a function of their environment that causes a particular ability of brain more develop out of its composite abilities.

Now! When it is set that the emotional maturity is learned so it is mostly a function of experience and wisdom. So it is better to tell the emotional maturity as emotional wisdom rather than emotional intelligence. Experience is a function of wisdom. When we say that emotional wisdom is learned then it become very important tool to evaluate the societies, laws organizations and cultures by comparing the emotional maturity of people based on their principles, set of beliefs and codes of ethics. Emotional intelligence is also very important tool for evaluating the societies and their values against the emotional maturity of people and the rate of progress and productivities of people.

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